I think Nick knew what this was well before I did. He dated a lot of people very casually before me, and he decided to pretty early on to only see me. He said he was talking to 4–5 other girls at the time.

I swore to not get into anything. I fought this hard right from the beginning. It’s funny to think about now

I wish I could remember exactly what I was thinking when he reached out to me right before our first date. I was all prepared to snuggle up at home and watch Spirited Away for the first time (which is hilarious because we ended up watching that together at some point)

I said something to Tim about being in relationship with someone that I wish I could remember verbatim.

It was something about how you never enter a relationship with anyone totally healed. The best you can do is try to understand your own wounding, fix what you can, and be in relationship with someone else as a mirror to better see your own wounding for you to heal, while also learning how to be with other people in their trauma and setting boundaries when their shit starts to affect you. It’s a give and take where two people are constantly growing from each other, putting ego aside and making each other better. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do, but it’s the hardest to achieve because you have to trust each other.

Nick is the first person I’ve met that I’d be willing to put this kind of work and effort for.

Just a lady (she/her) who thought she knew what she was doing, only to find she hadn’t even scratched the surface.